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Headline in the Daily Mail this morning: "It's women who moan most about their cold". For accuracy, that statement should have ended on the word "most"! tee hee.

"Hey fatty bum bum!" The trend for women to increase the size of their bottoms to look like US stars such as Jennifer Lopez and Kim Kardashian is catching on in the UK as figures show more women are injecting fat into their bodies than having it removed. So, the question is - where are they getting this bum fat from? I'm sure Mrs Carrington would be more than happy to donate some of hers! So guys - the answer to the question "does my bum look big in this?" is now a resounding "yes!"

"Perfume for babies". Dolce and Gabbana have made a perfume just for babies which they say contains scents of citrus, melon and honey which promise to "cuddle and pamper every little boy and girl" What a load of tosh! Citrusy twangs with a fusion of nappy couple with a gentle hint of rusk! Well, I'm sure it will be very popular with all those tasteless, tawdry celeb types!